5 years and 4 months ago, August 2005, I was about to start Sixth Form. I'd done ok in my GCSE's, well enough to get into the Sixth Form at Overton Grange to do the A-Levels I wanted. I was leaving behind the friends I'd had for 5 years at my old school.
It was in this August I noticed the headaches. I've always been a headachey person, but the last time I'd noticed headaches so regularly I was 8 and it turned out I needed glasses. But this time, I went straight to the opticians and they said I was fine, that I didn't even need the glasses I had. But I continued to get the headaches.
It's been suggested that my headache is psychological - that the stress of joining a new Sixth Form created my headache, and it started to maintain itself through the muscle tension it created as a result. I can understand this theory since I do find it hard to start at new places and make friends, but Sixth Form was the best time of my life, the best two years. So any stress that I had about it dissipated quickly. Why didn't the headache go?
As my diagnosis is Chronic Daily Tension Headache of muscular contraction type, the idea that my headache started psychologically, but remains because of muscle tension is logical, but can't be the whole story. This is where the theories of the consultants come in. My headache specialist nurse and I agreed that it is likely my headache started as a mixture of tension and medication overuse.
Medication overuse is a headache triggered by too many painkillers. Painkillers are designed to turn off the pain switch in your brain, which is switched on when you are in pain. Except, when you take too many painkillers, the your brain, and the pain switch, sort of build up an immunity, and the pain switch doesn't switch off, it just stays on. So, having been someone that relied on painkillers, they stopped working, and my headache never went away.
If my headache was just caused by medication overuse, at the beginning I could possibly have gotten rid of it by going cold turkey from painkillers, that's usually the cure. But I didn't know this until 3 years down the line, and at that point I went cold turkey but nothing happened. By that point, my headache was caused by the muscle tension I still have today.
Without knowing for sure what my headache was caused by, it's been hard to get effective treatment. I had 2 MRI scans incase the headache was caused by something in my brain (the second one was requested because my 2nd consultant thought I had an enlarged pituitary gland. I didn't. I do however, have a cyst in my brain, which is apparently normal... I should probably get that checked out again soon...) I also had blood tests to rule out anything else that could be causing it.
I treat my muscle tension the best I can, but I don't get regular massage and heat rub and heated pillow don't go far enough. My own personal theory is that if I had a whole series of massages in one week, to finally get my body unknotted, then I could start again, and treat my body better in order to be sure it won't get knotted up again.
But sometimes, not knowing what to do, because of not knowing what it is, is the hardest...
Monday, 20 December 2010
Thursday, 16 December 2010
Introduction
I am 21 years old, and I have had a headache every single day for 5 years and 4 months.
This blog will be a diary of my explorations into curing, or managing at the least, my headache. In addition to charting any progress made, I will give you the back story into my headache, which started in August 2005.
My official diagnosis is that of Chronic Daily Tension Headache of muscular contraction type. My previous diagnosis to this was migraine/tension headache, which sounds a lot more vague and was inaccurate in that although I have had suffered from migraine's in the past, I don't suffer from them regularly.
I hope with this blog that I can articulate my exact thoughts and feelings about my headache, and provide details for people who may have similar problems. To fill in the back story, I will tell you about the treatments I have had, such as Osteopathy and Acupuncture, as well as the different drugs I have taken, and the lifestyle changes suggested to, and sometimes made by, me.
Currently I am not on any medication. I take a fair amount of painkillers - some weeks, I can get away with only 2 painkillers, some weeks I take 2-4 everyday.
I try to live an active lifestyle, but I do not do any sport, and the most regular exercise I get is walking for 45 minutes to work, which is 3x a week. I do walk a lot in addition to this, but I gave up running/jogging a while ago. I have also not been swimming for almost 3 years because last time I tried to swim my headache was so bad I thought my head was going to cave in.
The type of headache I experience is hard to define. I have been asked many, many times to describe it, tell them where it happens, or whether it does this or that. It always does both. My headache can sometimes feel like a band around my headache, and sometimes it is a crushing pressure going inwards towards the brain. Sometimes I get stabbing pains in my temple, or behind my eyes, but also at the back of the head, or at the very top. I always have a dull ache, I can always feel my headache, but everyday it gets worse at some point. It feels like a rollercoaster: there are ups and downs, but I am always on it.
I have had 4 consultants, and a Headache Specialist Nurse, been on 6 different drugs (but not 6 different types of drugs), seen a Headache Psychologist, and another Psychologist at The Priory of all places. I've had 2 MRIs, 2 or 3 blood tests, and tried a range of alternative therapies and massages. Off the top of my head these are: Osteopathy, Acupuncture (twice), Acupressure, Kinesiology, Herbalism, Tui Na massage, Hands-Free massage, Shiatsu, Raynor massage, Ear-Candling and Reflexology. There are things I have found work, and some that don't. In the 5 years of having this headache, I have had what I call some "headache-free" sessions. These usually occur after having a particularly good and thorough massage, before I return to full-body awareness (for those of you who have had a really good massage, particularly Shiatsu, Tui-Na and Raynor, the types of massages that are very rough and strong but do wonders for actually getting knots out instead of just relaxing you you'll know that feeling where you feel just that little bit spaced out). Almost like before the blood rushes to my head again. These typically last about 15 minutes. I savour them.
I have at various times made various lifestyle changes, but there are things that trigger my headache that are typical, and things that generally should trigger my headache that actually don't.
(NB. When I say "trigger", I mean make it worsen.)
For example, chocolate (and I eat a fair amount of it), doesn't necessarily trigger a worse headache. I have cut it out before, and it made no difference. I did the same thing for caffeine (I don't drink tea or coffee, but I love Coca-Cola/Pepsi), no difference there either. I had a food intolerance test and they identified Cheese, Monosodium Glutamate and Saccharin as my problems foods. I avoid squash and saccharin in general because I agree with that, it does worsen my headache. I don't like cheese, but when I have it in foods it hasn't made my headache worse, and although I avoided MSG for a while, having had it since I noticed no problems.
The only other food I avoid because I know exacerbates my headache are Sesame Snaps. I used to eat these all the times when I was a kid, but after a break away from them, and then a return to packed lunches, I ate one and it triggered a migraine. It was horrible. I haven't touched them since.
Right now at this moment, I would say my headache is at 5 on a 1-10 scale (1 lowest, what I would call me "headache-free" sessions, 10 being so bad I want to die.)
I shouldn't use the words "want to die", because in general I am quite a happy person and I have no real desire to die. But I'm not going to lie - this headache gets me down sometimes, and when it gets so bad I can't think or see or function as a person, I wonder why I bother. I might have this for the rest of my life - why not just call it quits now?
Except I won't. I might have been cursed with this headache, but I am positive I can do something to sort it out. I might, after all, have caused it (more on that in the next blog, which I will probably call 'Origins').
Anyway, with this level 5 headache, I am going to go to sleep. Too little sleep - headache. Too much sleep - headache. And whenever I wake up - headache. Figure that one out.
This blog will be a diary of my explorations into curing, or managing at the least, my headache. In addition to charting any progress made, I will give you the back story into my headache, which started in August 2005.
My official diagnosis is that of Chronic Daily Tension Headache of muscular contraction type. My previous diagnosis to this was migraine/tension headache, which sounds a lot more vague and was inaccurate in that although I have had suffered from migraine's in the past, I don't suffer from them regularly.
I hope with this blog that I can articulate my exact thoughts and feelings about my headache, and provide details for people who may have similar problems. To fill in the back story, I will tell you about the treatments I have had, such as Osteopathy and Acupuncture, as well as the different drugs I have taken, and the lifestyle changes suggested to, and sometimes made by, me.
Currently I am not on any medication. I take a fair amount of painkillers - some weeks, I can get away with only 2 painkillers, some weeks I take 2-4 everyday.
I try to live an active lifestyle, but I do not do any sport, and the most regular exercise I get is walking for 45 minutes to work, which is 3x a week. I do walk a lot in addition to this, but I gave up running/jogging a while ago. I have also not been swimming for almost 3 years because last time I tried to swim my headache was so bad I thought my head was going to cave in.
The type of headache I experience is hard to define. I have been asked many, many times to describe it, tell them where it happens, or whether it does this or that. It always does both. My headache can sometimes feel like a band around my headache, and sometimes it is a crushing pressure going inwards towards the brain. Sometimes I get stabbing pains in my temple, or behind my eyes, but also at the back of the head, or at the very top. I always have a dull ache, I can always feel my headache, but everyday it gets worse at some point. It feels like a rollercoaster: there are ups and downs, but I am always on it.
I have had 4 consultants, and a Headache Specialist Nurse, been on 6 different drugs (but not 6 different types of drugs), seen a Headache Psychologist, and another Psychologist at The Priory of all places. I've had 2 MRIs, 2 or 3 blood tests, and tried a range of alternative therapies and massages. Off the top of my head these are: Osteopathy, Acupuncture (twice), Acupressure, Kinesiology, Herbalism, Tui Na massage, Hands-Free massage, Shiatsu, Raynor massage, Ear-Candling and Reflexology. There are things I have found work, and some that don't. In the 5 years of having this headache, I have had what I call some "headache-free" sessions. These usually occur after having a particularly good and thorough massage, before I return to full-body awareness (for those of you who have had a really good massage, particularly Shiatsu, Tui-Na and Raynor, the types of massages that are very rough and strong but do wonders for actually getting knots out instead of just relaxing you you'll know that feeling where you feel just that little bit spaced out). Almost like before the blood rushes to my head again. These typically last about 15 minutes. I savour them.
I have at various times made various lifestyle changes, but there are things that trigger my headache that are typical, and things that generally should trigger my headache that actually don't.
(NB. When I say "trigger", I mean make it worsen.)
For example, chocolate (and I eat a fair amount of it), doesn't necessarily trigger a worse headache. I have cut it out before, and it made no difference. I did the same thing for caffeine (I don't drink tea or coffee, but I love Coca-Cola/Pepsi), no difference there either. I had a food intolerance test and they identified Cheese, Monosodium Glutamate and Saccharin as my problems foods. I avoid squash and saccharin in general because I agree with that, it does worsen my headache. I don't like cheese, but when I have it in foods it hasn't made my headache worse, and although I avoided MSG for a while, having had it since I noticed no problems.
The only other food I avoid because I know exacerbates my headache are Sesame Snaps. I used to eat these all the times when I was a kid, but after a break away from them, and then a return to packed lunches, I ate one and it triggered a migraine. It was horrible. I haven't touched them since.
Right now at this moment, I would say my headache is at 5 on a 1-10 scale (1 lowest, what I would call me "headache-free" sessions, 10 being so bad I want to die.)
I shouldn't use the words "want to die", because in general I am quite a happy person and I have no real desire to die. But I'm not going to lie - this headache gets me down sometimes, and when it gets so bad I can't think or see or function as a person, I wonder why I bother. I might have this for the rest of my life - why not just call it quits now?
Except I won't. I might have been cursed with this headache, but I am positive I can do something to sort it out. I might, after all, have caused it (more on that in the next blog, which I will probably call 'Origins').
Anyway, with this level 5 headache, I am going to go to sleep. Too little sleep - headache. Too much sleep - headache. And whenever I wake up - headache. Figure that one out.
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