Don't Let It Get Me

It's hard not to be disappointed. Going to a new alternative therapist, hoping against hope that this one will be different. This one will work wonders.
This one can help you be fixed.


First impressions aren't everything but...my first impressions were not favourable.

"So, dude, what do you think's inside that hatch thing?" "Hope. I think hope's inside."

August 2015 is an important anniversary. In 1 year and 2 months I will have had this headache for 10 years. 

A decade of pain. A decade of frustration and despair. 

A decade of false hope.

I don't want to get to August next year and still be in pain. I want it to stop. I want to be better. I want to be fixed. 

When I was told that because I had chronic pain I couldn't bungy jump, I was angry. Angry at my body, my head. Angry at life. I wanted to get this sorted, I wanted it to stop holding me back. I wanted to be free.

So I went to the doctor yesterday, to ask his opinion. To ask someone else what I should be doing, what I could be doing. 

I opened the hatch. 

And what was inside?

Sorry Locke, but it sure as hell wasn't hope. 

I want to be fixed? 

It's about time I fixed myself.